So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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