make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
pop tarts are not kleenex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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