i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize