yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
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We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
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i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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