Dual....:-)
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize