Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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