We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
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