On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
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im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
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why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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