she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
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So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
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There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize