my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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