Dual....:-)
Your face is a jimmy john
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
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