I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize