And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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