In the future we'll all be gay
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize