were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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