After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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