i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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