yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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