feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
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Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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