You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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