you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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