Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize