We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
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I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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