Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize