keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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