are you still at the devil's house?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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