I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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