i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
me + whiskey = a bad person
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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