Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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