i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
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