He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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