If that was your dad, he is hot
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize