bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
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he confused my yawn for an orgasm
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
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Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
What happened to fro yo and sex?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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