you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
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