he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
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when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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