dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Randomize