While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize