My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize