Got a toothbrush?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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