i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize