Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Sext me about skeletons
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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