I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Your penis caused this!
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