I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
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