He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
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knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
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