Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
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