apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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