WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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