I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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