Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
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