My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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